Here’s an exercise that you might find helpful.
One of the things we all confront when we decide to walk our own path, forge our own trail, or live our own lives, is criticism from others. Sometimes it is intentionally mean to hurt us. But other times it is just the fearful proclamations of our loved ones to bring us back under control and secure expectations.
It’s difficult living under the criticisms of others. It doesn’t seem to matter how old we are, sometimes criticisms, judgements, and condemnations somehow seep through our clothes, our skin and deep into our bones.
We wrongly accept and even adopt the false and limiting beliefs of others about ourselves.
If this takes place in our minds, then it has to be corrected in our minds. In other words, if someone criticizes you, then in your mind you must reject it. If it means nothing to you, you can even ignore it. It means nothing. But, if it hits a soft spot, a nerve, your Achilles heel, then in your mind you’re going to have to refute it!
So, here’s our exercise:
- What is one criticism you’ve received that you just can’t seem to shake?
- Write it down!
- Write why this bugs you so much.
- Refute it! Turn it around! Rename it!
I’ll give an example from my own life:
- You’re stubborn and won’t listen.
- There, I wrote it down. Weird power that has! It also makes it less nebulous and more real and located on a sheet of paper.
- It bugs me so much because I know I can be stubborn and get an idea stuck in my head I just can’t let go. It also bugs me because it’s usually someone trying to control me who uses this criticism against me. And I hate being controlled.
- I’m not stubborn! I’m persistent! I persevere! Sometimes I believe I am right even when many people don’t think I am. And I DO listen if it is true. if not I won’t! So, I am stubborn when it comes to things that are true and good. And I am determined to walk my own path, even if this upsets people.
There! That feels better. How about you? What did you come up with?
Care to share?