I know I’ve talked about this book a couple of times already, but I want to mention it again: Moorjani’s, “Dying to be Me”. What a fascinating read that sheds a lot of light on what many of us are experiencing.
She needed a Near Death Experience to get the revelation she’s living in now. I now conclude that many of us, through out traumatic spiritual deconstructions, experienced a kind of Near Death Experience in our spiritual lives that has had an extensive impact on the rest of our lives, more than just spiritual.
One of the interesting effects her experience has had is that she is lonely more often than before her NDE. I’ll let her speak for herself:
“I’ve also found that although I have made some new friends– including one in particular who’s really helped me understand and process my experience– I seem to have difficulty reconnecting with many of my old ones. I’m not as social as I was in the past, and I don’t enjoy the same things. I had a lot of friends before, but now I only let a very, very few people into my private life, many of whom I met through an NDE group over the last few years. A handful of us have become very close, and some of them have had similar experiences of their own.
“I’m also still devoted to my immediate family members– my husband, mother, and brother. They were with me right through my crisis and my hours of need, and I feel very attached to them. It’s become difficult for me to feel that close to others.
“It’s not that I try to be a loner. I still reach out, and I really enjoy helping people gain greater understanding, which I do through my writing and my current work as a cultural trainer…”
Can you see how similar her life is to ours? She’s learned the art of just being herself fearlessly. As a result, there are very few people who “get” her. They aren’t on the same page and therefore don’t understand. You know what she’s talking about. I do! The many friends I lost are gone. They do not understand me. Only a few people do. And in order for me to live my life fearlessly, there are only these few people who I welcome into my inner life and circle because they don’t threaten my living fearlessly.
So this has helped me realize that this loneliness we experience is not a bad thing, but a natural consequence. And perhaps it is actually a reflection of our desire to live our own lives fearlessly as well. I am close to Lisa and my children and just a handful of local friends. And, like Moorjani, I have made new ones who have gone through a similar experience as I have– YOU GUYS! You are the ones I now consider my friends, my support, my inner circle.
We get each other. We relate. We empathize. And this is no small gift!