It is important at times to simply give yourself a break.
When I left the church almost three years ago, there was a long period of time when I never even looked at my bible. It sat on the shelf. I’ll be honest: I don’t pick it up nearly as much as I used to. Of course, as a preacher, I used it every day of the week preparing for my sermons and feeding my own spiritual life.
I chose not to feel guilty about it. I took comfort in the fact that the bible was firmly planted in heart and mind. It was feeding my spiritual life by osmosis anyway… percolating away deep in my inner being.
One of the things we have to learn as we find our own spiritual freedom and independence is how to be self-determining, self-advocating, and self-educating.
Letting go of imposed habits in order to let them become our natural desires can be scary, but I think necessary.