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My son is sick. It might be no more than scarlet fever (because apparently we live in Little House on the Prairie days). But his doctor thinks it’s Kawasaki disease, which is much more serious. Of course, I’m terrified. Even without treatment prognosis is good, but he’s high risk due to his age and the symptoms are SCARY. One of the things I’m feeling right now is the acute loss of prayers. Before, I would have just asked God to please make him better. But I don’t believe prayer works that way anymore (if I ever really believed that to begin with). And now I’m just feeling sad and worried without the comfort of magical thinking, and it makes me feel afraid.