I just wanted to use that big word. There! I feel better now.
As we deconstruct our theology and beliefs, it is natural to be afraid. But remember:
The image is not the thing. The word is not the thing. The idea is not the thing.
The image: De-anthropomorphizing is usually the first step. Letting go of the image. When your customary image of “God” comes to mind, simply dismiss it. Let it go. It took me a long time to finally notice that my image of God, who looked remarkably like my dad, no longer ruled in my mind. The image is not the thing.
The word: Next, stop using the word(s) you’ve been using to denote “God”. I stopped using the customary words for God long ago, and after a while I notice that they were no longer a part of my vocabulary. We have good precedent for this in the Jewish tradition of the tetragrammaton… the four letter unpronounceable word for “God”, YHWH. The word is not the thing.
The idea: Finally, the idea is not the thing. You’ve dropped a mental image. You’ve dropped the word. Dropping the idea is the most difficult but most beautiful. Look at a rose. Don’t think of the rose. Don’t compare it to a mental image you have of a perfect rose. Don’t do a word study on the word “rose”. Just look at the rose and enjoy it. Look at it without a thought. Smell it without a thought. Feel its petals without a thought.
The image is not the thing. The word is not the thing. The idea is not the thing.
So if you’re afraid of becoming an agnostic, or worse, an atheist, just remember that after you’ve dropped the image, the word and the idea, the fear will eventually dissipate, because now you know that what is real remains.