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Good blog post on the things we say to one another in our attempt to fix. I put this under spiritual abuse, because often when you’re going through a tough time, it can feel abusive to hear well-meaning advice, when what you really need is a listening ear and a little compassion.
http://rachelmariestone.com/2013/06/26/how-not-to-help-someone-who-is-hurting/
Ya I like the last strip. That’s what I would do! Pizza and beer.
when we initially left the church that was one of the main reasons why. we had gone through two very difficult years emotionally and physically (for me) and everyone seemed to have an opinion on what god was doing. all along we said we just wanted to hear from him. we asked and pleaded and prayed and the only response at all were from church members telling us that god would make sense of it all when we are dead, that he is god and can do whatever he wants and it’s good even when it seems abusive, that maybe there was sin somewhere unconfessed, that maybe what we were asking wasn’t right for us (health, family, financial, etc) and maybe god just wanted us to suffer because we did such a good job at it. the noise was overwhelming. it was truly deafening and there were so may times leaving church the last few months where I’d be sobbing and my hubby would have to console me because of hurtful words from someone who wanted to help. there are times the silence and loneliness feels like too much but I’d take it any day over the noise.
oh and pizza and beer sounds like an amazing answer
I think the whole “all powerful” god layer became just more noise for me. When I look out at the world without having to explain why god didn’t help is a whole lot easier for me. I like the statement that Scott Peck opens up with in “The Road Less Travelled.” He states that life is difficult and once you stop expecting it to be otherwise you get to live life without that layer of resentment.
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