Blog › Forums › Deconstruction › Family & Friends › How much do you tell family?
Tagged: coming out, gay, lgbtq, parents
This topic contains 34 replies, has 21 voices, and was last updated by KellieM78 3 months, 2 weeks ago.
Spirituality is generally not something that is discussed in the family, except for a few references by others that evoke an evangelical catch phrase. If religion comes up, I know there isn’t going to be any “discussion,” since I know that no one is inclined to listen to anything I actually have to say (and I’ve already heard all the things they have to say and generally reject them). So, I’ve just decided that this will never be a part of my relationship with my family. I’m actually quite comfortable with that.
I’m in much the same boat as you.
I had my first “coming out” yesterday. I talked to a close friend who had moved away. She was patient, understanding, not too nosy . . .all good. But I still felt shame in the telling, and feel shame in this writing . . .
Any of you read Brene Brown’s books or watch her TED talks? They’ve been helpful. I’m trying to figure out what the base root of the shame is . . .
I guess since I was three I have been told that you have to believe, that God would help you, that if you prayed and read the Bible enough then you would believe. So I think the shame comes from feeling that I wasn’t good enough to get the “believe ticket.”
The shame also comes from being so inarticulate about my beliefs. It was such a struggle to find the words that were true.
I appreciate you all being here–this is tough, feels like a lonely road.
Don’t give up on your struggle to find the words that are true. I like the way you said that Tracey!
hey I was just reading through this and noticed my post says anonymous. why is that?
Kellie
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